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Green Flags in A Relationship

The word 'Green Flag' is not mostly used unlike the 'Red Flag'. One thing we must all remember is that we do not always have to focus on the negative aspects of our relationships, we must also highlight the good and positive aspects of our relationships.

Green flags are good and healthy signs that one can be able to notice in a relationship.

Relationships do come with challenges but this should not obstruct the goodness of a partner. In today's world, you'll notice that people are always looking into the negative side of relationships and this greatly impacts our thoughts. 

What you think is what you become! Green flags bring a good perspective about an individual and this makes you appreciate them despite their mistakes or downfall.

It is equally important for us to be able to recognize healthy relationships. That way, we can begin to gravitate toward people who exhibit those healthy qualities from the start, increasing our chances of finding ourselves in the kinds of relationships that actually feel good.


Green flags in a relationship

A green flag is a behavior or personal quality that indicates the person you're with will approach relationships in the future in a healthy, mature, and generally desirable manner.

When a relationship starts, individuals always anticipate having a good experience with each other. Here are some green flags to look out for in your relationship:

1. Good listeners

Take note if your partner makes an effort to hear and understand you. If they ask thoughtful questions, make room for you in the conversation, and are interested in learning about your inner world.

One thing that is really disrespectful is when you're talking to your partner but he's involved in other activities and worse of it, is that he/ she is not paying attention. When you're not a good listener to your partner, your partner eventually stops opening up to you. This is because they know that you won't pay much attention to what they're talking about and this might lead to mistrust between partners.


You should also be an active listener. Try to contribute to the conversation but don't cut your partner when he/ she is talking. 

"Essentially, it provides the speaker with the space and attunement to be able to be vulnerable, which can enhance relationships both in times of peace as well as conflict," states licensed marriage and family therapist Tiana Leeds, M.A 

Couples will always disagree and unintentionally hurt each other, and being able to listen well and truly make an effort to understand your partner's perspective is essential for healthy conflict resolution.

2. They're comfortable when talking about their feelings.

This is a sign of a good and healthy relationship. Your partner doesn't;t have to hide any feelings toward you. This is because they've gained your full trust and they are good when opening up.

A healthy relationship necessitates two people who can recognize their own emotions, where they come from, and what they require at any given time, and who can then share those emotions and needs with each other.

3. High self-awareness

You can objectively evaluate yourself, manage your emotions, align your behavior with your values, and correctly understand how others perceive you if you are highly self-aware.

A person who spends time reflecting on their experiences and trying to better understand themselves is more likely to be intentional about how they behave in relationships and to be able to identify issues as they arise. Self-awareness also implies that they will be able to recognize and admit when they are the source of the problems.

4. Empathy

It is the ability to comprehend or feel what another person is going through from within their own frame of reference.


A good partner can recognize your emotions as well as their own. They may feel sad when you are sad, or they may understand when and why you are sad, show compassion in such situations, and make you feel validated in what you are going through.

5. Willingness to be vulnerable

In order for true intimacy to develop in relationships, people must be willing to take emotional risks and open themselves up to the possibility of love (or rejection).

A person who can form secure attachments with others is willing to emotionally open up, be vulnerable with another person, and form close relationships with others. Rather than keeping their cards close to their chest, they are open about how they feel about you, openly caring and affectionate, and willing to let you in.

6. They know what they want

In dating, clarity is always beneficial. Whether they are aware that they are looking for something serious or that they are only interested in casual dating right now, the point is that this person is open and honest with you.

They are also interested in what you want from the relationship and will ask you about it, and they are not afraid to have open discussions about where the relationship is (or isn't) going.

7. They're kind

They are concerned about your feelings and well-being, and they make an effort to treat you well and ensure your safety.

When it comes to kindness, partners should not only be kind to themselves but also to the people around them. How they treat others, especially relatives and friends also influence how they're going to treat you.

No one is perfect all of the time, but in general, you want to be with someone who is consistent in trying to do the right thing for others.

8. They have stability

When the person you're interested in dating is relatively stable in terms of what you can expect from them, it's a good sign. You can rely on them to be consistent in how they treat you and how they approach various life situations.

9. They're easy to be around.

A sign of a green flag is that when you're around these people you feel so comfortable. You don't have to impress them or walk on eggshells not to upset them. You also feel safe with them and you don't have to pretend.


10. They take positive steps towards becoming better

It's a good sign when someone can take feedback without becoming defensive, accept responsibility for their actions and issues, and then take action to change. Words and values must be translated into actions.

According to psychologists John Gottman, Ph.D., and Robert Levenson, Ph.D., what distinguishes happy couples from unhappy couples is that happy couples have a ratio of five positive interactions for every one negative interaction.

These are just some of the few green flags that you'll notice in your relationship and embrace them since they will make your relationship move to a higher level.


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